Often times we observe microagression
, but are not aware that it is occurring. Sometimes we initiate it and are not aware of
doing so. What do we do in these situations? What don’t we do?
I encountered a situation which at the time I was not aware that it was defined as microinvalidation.
I recently held a conversation with
a group of friends both male and female and males getting a pedicure and a
manicure. Instantly some replied that’s gay if a man gets his feet and nails
done, especially if another man is doing it and he adds polish to it.
This to me is an example of
homosexual men being marginalized as men who get there nails done. All homosexual
men don’t fall in that category. We must
not assume that actions such as these are only limited to one group.
In this situation I explained that
the polish, who does it does not matter. It is about having a choice and
options of ways of grooming yourself- unisex ways of doing so. Is it not ok for
a man to get his hair cut and washed by another man I asked; a practice that
many partake in male and female, homosexual and heterosexual?
I think in situations like this one
sometimes people act out of stupidity or lack of knowledge and fear of what it is
that they don’t know.
Hi Stephanie,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Just because a man may want to have a manicure and pedicure they should not be thought of as gay. My Dad likes to have this done because he feels that they do a better job than he does and he enjoys the foot massage and hand massage. We are so quick to categorize people when really it is none of our business what they do or why.
Stephanie,
ReplyDeleteI’ve had a very similar conversation with a group of friends about the same topic. The results were the same, we agreed to disagree. I agree grooming yourself is a healthy habit, the way you groom yourself is a personal choice. “To each its own”
You make a very poignent statement about these types of conversations/comments stemming from ignorance. I know it sounds childish on some levels but I often wonder how people would feel or how they would respond if a similar comment was made about them. A woman, for instance, who goes to a barber instead of a hair dresser; or prefers a female masseuse.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, but more for engaging in the conversation with your friends. If we all take advantage of the "teachable moments" we may make a larger impact than we thought!